Time Sands....
I'm inside the exam hall, bored to death and sleepy, this three hours exam is really not my favourite thing to do..and, here I am, writing directionlessly..Well, this morning marking of another day gone by with in my ever filling diary of life, it occurred to me just how finite this all is, that each day crossed is another gone never to be reclaimed, one step nearer to the totality of life..No..No..I'm not going to talk about death again, alright!! Though it may sound corny..heheOne more passing day in the diary of my life. Flipping forwards things to do, things moved from yesterday to today and tomorrow, events passing, events to come all dictated by time, the pale momentum moving on and on, myself powerless in my plight as I move forward, not being really sure of what to expect in the future... Even if I drag my heals and kick and scream, I can not stop the flight, time will not pause for me..Everything will fade into pale insignificance as day by day the time just slips away.
Flipping forwards in my diary, dates to come, meetings here, and meetings there, this to do and that to do, hours slipping by.. Just when did I buy in to all of this? How did I become so lost in the pages of my diary.. I do not recall ever agreeing to this, its just evolved around me, happened, one tiny date then another and yet more, each in turn filling up the pages of my diary, my time, my life..Things that I don't remember, but it happened..things that happened in front of my very eyes but could never be understood..Desparate for more explanation, but all to my dismay...Never, and they will be buried in the sand of time..
Struggling to move forward, trying to fix things while it can still be fixed..and making new plans in life..I just feel like I'm running out of help, and Faith...Where are you..? I'm losing you too..Is this my future so neatly marked by my own hand, is this all that I have to look forward to? My life mapped out like a grid before me, ordered, equal, right.. Just how did I become such a part of a system I can not stand.. Am I really as bad, buying into a dream of false happiness, burying my head in the sand of life’s delusional shores? How did this happen? How can it be? is this what I have become? Is this the way its meant to be? Page by page crossed out until my diary’s final page for me and out I slip and go? Then, in the end, I somehow understand that things happened, and there's nothing we can do about it..
History will be always the story of the past..Whether it is to be told and pass down to the next generation or, it will remain history and unknown to any...Fixing things that went wrong is harder than fixing a chimney on top of your roof..Let the sand of time heals everything, and wish that life would be easy and you may find happiness..and yes, thats definite...only if you see things from different side of views...
man..what am I saying again..? emm..this is what happen if you're bored, sleepy and you still have to invigilate for exam....
Have a nice day today, mine was great yesterday...hehe
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