maybe I'm just lonely..huhu
Some say it’s impossible for them to be happy alone. They throw their hands up in the air when it gets too tough. They don’t know why it’s tough, or why they can’t stand being alone. Others will agree that if a person can’t be their own island they surely can’t be one for another, and some live life without any close relationships at all. I think it’s natural for people to get together. People want close relationships with others. That’s part of how we have survived as a species. Afterall, I still believe that 'no man is an island unto himself'..
For me it’s been important to learn to fill the gaps without automatically looking to another. I feel as though finally I’ve come to some agreement with myself. That I can be the man I want to be even if I don’t share my life with someone. There is great solace now when I think about tomorrow, and my future. I know that it depends on me, and what I can do with myself while I have this time here. It has been such a huge leap to be where I am and who I am now from where I started out as this awkward boy who needed to feel needed all the time. It’s emotional too, because I know all these things, but I can’t talk to anyone..How pathetic..
Anyway, I'm a grown up, I can look out across the horizon alone and still feel this inescapable peace. I’ve loved and love enough to be full in the heart, wherever my path goes. It’s ok to be me. It’s more than ok. It’s everything there is for me, and that is what I need it to be..
emm, somehow, I don't know why I have this sudden feeling..I should get back and continue my photoshop tutorials..hehehe..I'll write more when the urge comes..I hope, it would be of something different..hehehe
To be adult is to be alone...???
Nay' that's not what I mean..it's just that sometimes we feel lonely, eventhough we're surrounded by people, even those we call friends around us..but, there would be times when loneliness passes by and we feel empty..duii punya main kasian..hahhaha..Neway, my random thoughts ja tu..hehe
hehehe mesh...ur random thoughts ka...but in actual fact u thought about it kan...must've kinda impact to ur life r8 now...hahaha menyibuk..! neway sumhow wen we got nuthing to do, no 1 to talk to, no activities, bored etc...those wild, random thoughts coming all over dominating corrupting our thinking...don't get me wrong..butul kama nie...ahaks!
there's this concept that has been playing in my mind for a while, fed in by a priest during confession...
he just said that i may be (suffering) from existential loneliness...
man the one phrase has led to a snowballing effect of books gathering - philosophical and psychological writings on the matter of existentialism...
but now i think i already understand slightly better
Jericho..Ya ba butul la ba tu..Ko pun ka? hehehe..Lek ja ba..Sa nda juga lonely butul ni, nasib baik ada si rex, bobbi and sisqo..hehehe
arteo..Wow..Good for you..It's good to know that we know what is happening and the cause behind it all..nda la ko bingung berabis kan..hehehe
ooops on the contrary i still dont fully understand existential loneliness... but i know the philosophy of existentialism... which isnt exactly the answer i was looking for... sigh...
and looking at the book i've bought and read... sigh...
ironically (or not) head knowledge doesn't guarantee that we'll know what to do with our lives (or loneliness)...
me? yep I'm lonely... no shame in admitting that, still looking for a niche to belong to I suppose...
kalau lonely sa main game , baca shin chan, ketawa2 dan menangis sendiri huhuhu
Loneliness ia a part of me.. Get use to it since long time ago..
Thats life is all about..