Random Thoughts

The Red Glam Party was a successful event...We're glad that we have done something to raise fund for MAF (Malaysian AIDS Foundation)...To be frank, I was a bit nervous and worried that not many people will turn up, apart from those who have purchased the tickets..but, it turned well..very well..We have full house that night..This was according to the Assistant Manager of D Junction...Perhaps, maybe they are not use to see so many customers on a Sunday...

The party started a bit off schedule...but it was alright..and Junior's introduction about the event was brief and superb...He was very spontaneous up the stage..I guess everyone was having fun that night..the food was simply delicious, the programs were simple but very entertaining, especially from the Diva's Club...Thanks to them, for without them the party won't be that happening...

I was enjoying the party myself..I've got to meet and made new friends..taking pics of random people...being able to talk to anyone even if I don't know them, aah..that was really enjoyable, some of the pics will be featured in the Breeze magazine...Gosh..I was extraordinarily friendly that night...No one expect me to be that man sitting at the bar minding his own business anyway...Hehehe...

We stayed until way beyond closing time...and by the time we left, we were 'there' already..If you know what I mean...Anyway, it was really fun..The O2C members are looking forward to organizing more events in the future..and now, we know..we are capable of doing this..and one thing for sure, people start to recognize us...and inviting us over to their places, and asking us to organize their events...I say, this is Great....Way to Go O2Cs...We ROCK....Hehehe

To everyone...the video of the whole event is done, and will be out in the very near future..Who ever wants to have a copy of the CD, you can get it for a small price...and, this one will go to KASIH..Sabah AIDS Foundation...Thanks for your continuous supports..

To all the committee members...We're gonna have our post mortem for the party this Friday at Cock and Bull...all O2C are welcome to join us..because there will be another event for us this coming Friday at Cock & Bull Tg. Aru...I'm expecting everyone to be there...Cheers...

Pictures will be out tomorrow....I have thousands of them...hehehe..Kidding

We (the O2C members) have been quite busy these past few days preparing for our first Red Glam Party...This party is organized by our group in conjunction with the World AIDS Day which is happening in the whole world this December...This is one of our biggest events for this year..

When we first started, we were just a bunch of friends who love to go out and have fun..but as we go along together, we started planning for a proper activities...and we have came up with lots of outdoor activities, charity and voluteering works...Seriously, I have never been involve in so many activities before, but thanks to these friends...together we make things happened..and we enjoy it very much...

Just today, few of us went to volunteer for KASIH's (SABAH AIDS FOUNDATION) HIV/AIDS Awareness Campaign in Karamunsing Complex..It was fun, going around distributing flyers, brochures and condoms to the general public...I have this big signage hanging on my neck saying " I HAVE AIDS, PLEASE HUG ME "...Some were not even dare to come near, as if I really have AIDS...huhu..but, there were some who came and gave a warm hug...and I realized, most of our people are not aware about AIDS yet...

Tomorrow we are having this Red Glam Party..our tickets have been sold out, and we are expecting more attendees than our original target which is only 120 pax...This is very good, we are happy and I can say proud that we managed to organize such an event..Thanks to our sponsors who have been very suppportive and generous...Yesterday, Lumis received a phone call from someone who is willing to do a video coverage for the party tomorrow...Wow...Thanks Vinoun Vista...

To those of you who want to come to this party...you are most welcome..Lets all party while giving just a little for a good cause...

COngrats O2C!!!!!!!!!

Cheers......

Last night I had a dream that I was cast as Harry in Harry Potter... But I had too many obligations, like practising my magics, trying to fly with a stolen broom..nothing ever work.. and I missed three weeks of rehearsals...I was soooo worried, I could have confessed that I cried in my dream..and then, when the opening night came, I insisted with my manager, who happened to be none other but si Junior himself, that I had to be at the show... I have promised to be there...my fans are waiting for my first appearance..(I don't know what happened to the real cast, the real Harry Potter..but in my dream, I was more famous than he is...cool..:)..)

I arrived in a wizard costume..(all blacks, I looked so confident, and in my dream, I thought, I really can perform magics..) and everyone was staring at me and asking me, “Where the hell have you been?” with their eyes... I was anxious and guilt-stricken, thinking about all of the work that had gone on while I was away...I said, I was busy practising my magics, while trying to hide my shaking legs... I told them I was ready, “Please put me on stage.” The stage manager looked at me sternly and asked if I knew my parts.. Have I memorized all of my lines?

And that’s when my heart sank... I didn’t know a single line... I didn’t even know where my script was...I have never been given any before..and I thought, I could just come up there and say anything I want.. I wanted to keep my promise, but I was wholly unprepared... Completely inept...and I said to myself..I could never be Harry Potter..just because I don't remember my lines...That was terrible..

And then I flushed with embarrassment as my understudy walked by, fully decked out in wizard costume... I bit my lip, wondering why I hadn’t just given up, when I didn’t have a clue what I was doing?...

Then I was awakened...Rex was whining next to me...He needed to pee...

Huh...it was really a weird dream..I've never had any dream like that..Maybe, I was hard headed..I've never given up so easily..I'm quite persistent..sometimes, if not most of the time..or maybe...it was just a dream, and it has no meaning at all...

HIV/AIDS was nonexistent in Malaysia until 1986. Between 1986 and December 2000, this country, which has a population of nearly 25 million, recorded more than 38,044 cases of HIV/AIDS. That number has continued to grow, climbing to 51,256 cases by 2002 and 58,012 by 2003. As of September 2004, a cumulative total of 61,486 HIV-infected individuals had been reported to Malaysia’s Ministry of Health, of whom 8,955 had AIDS and 7,083 had died.

The majority of the cases are detected through screening processes conducted at drug rehabilitation centers, prisons, and antenatal clinics, or through tests done on those whose spouses are HIV-positive. Although the government initiated a free screening program in June 2003, only a small number of those considered to be in “high-risk groups” have volunteered to be tested.

Malaysian women are vulnerable to HIV infection due to a lack of knowledge and understanding of its cause, risks, and modes of transmission, fear of stigma and discrimination, and their inability to protect themselves from an infected sexual partner. For some, it is taboo to talk about sex openly. This has encouraged the growth of the epidemic and has affected the community. The 2005 Durex Global Sex Survey, the world’s largest sex survey, revealed that 35% of Malaysians admitted to having unprotected sex without knowing their partner’s sexual history. HIV infection continues to grow at a rate of about 4,000 cases per year, indicating that preventive measures have not yet had any impact..and report has that, in 2015, the number would increase to 30,000 cases per year...

World AIDS Day is observed every year on December 1st. The World Health Organization established World AIDS Day in 1988. World AIDS Day provides governments, national AIDS programs, faith organizations, community organizations, and individuals with an opportunity to raise awareness and focus attention on the Global Aids epidemic.

In conjunction with the World AIDS Day which is happening in all over the world, the O2C (our social club) is organizing a party which is called the RED GLAM PARTY to raise some funds to support KASIH..Sabah AIDS Foundation..This event also wishes to create awareness among our local people, especially the younger generation about the importance of AIDS Knowledge...


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Dear readers, fellow bloggers, visitors and my beloved friends...

You are all invited to this event..the RED GLAM PARTY, the first of its kind in SABAH...With your generous donation of RM30, you would be able to help alot to support KASIH..SABAH AIDS FOUNDATION... On the night itself, there will be buffet dinner (you don't have to eat at home), soft drinks and red wine (only)...Performances from our local artistes as mentioned in the Banner above, dance performances...and Red Carpet photoshoot..So, you guys and gals, you are required to dress up glamourously..Hollywood Style...

Thanks for supporting us...you guys ROCK....

My whole life i was the one that liked taking pictures and thinking of the memories it had...eventually I notice I was like that with everything, and I almost thought the only reason I was brought into this life is to be stuck in the past... I want to move on, meet new people, make things, I want to start living...

I realized its okay to embrace the memories of the past, but not to let yourself be dictated by the “use to be’s” I realized I had to stop looking in the rear view mirror of life because it prevented me from focusing on what was ahead of me... It’s all moment to moment, but eventually it will be day to day and soon enough I will be completely free...

Since I let go and stopped living in the past, I feel so much freedom, I had forgotten what it was like to feel free...Now, I'm feeling it again..It feels like Independence Day everyday... I feel like a weight has been lifted off of me...and I feel so light, that the soft breeze can fly me away... The thing is living in the past only causes pain, because it doesn’t allow you to grow as an individual and eventually you end up losing years of your life in a relationship that had so much pain..

Living in the past was only good for a temporary moment, but it left me trapped and it was so hard to let the past go and live for today…but I thank God he released me from all of that…this one is hard for me... On one hand there are so many great things that I love about the past, friends, fun times, my childhood and i want more than anything else to be back in that time...On the other hand there are a couple bad things that i just need to get over and quit obsessing about...I'm living a better life now, and as I set my head to look nowhere else but to my future...I'm excited about life..I'm excited about everything...but this is soon going to be 'in the past' as well...

For now..I just wanna cherish my life...

Have a wonderful weekends ahead...

I want to say thankyou.

When you have a friend who stands by you, always there for you, always supports you, how do you say thank you? When you are all alone, well, not all alone but people get tired of being there for you, you've worn them out, or you've worn yourself out, who do you turn to? How do you trust when you want to push everyone away because of the pain and yet hold them close because you're afraid to let go but no one wants you to do that?

My dogs are always there. Always. They all have their own little ways of showing it. Sisqo is calm, quiet, puts his head up to mine and just stares in my eyes. If I don't have time, that's ok, he'll wait..I thought, he was hard headed, just because he is a mixed breed..a German Shepherd and Rottweiler's blood are in his body..I thought, his temperament is unpredictable..Nonetheless, he was that cute little puppy, I carried home from Gaya Street..and I love him all so dearly..

Yukiko, my little silly girl, pushy, insistant she wants my attention, just looking at her will make you smile. She licks my tears away. She will distract me and play and bite my heels and feet until I can't resist her anymore..I can't never train her..I guess that is natural for a spitz..She would get herself dirty in mud..or wet under the rain..but, after a while..She'll be as clean as if she has just taken a shower...

And Rex, the most devoted dog I've ever had...Not actually mine..It's Junior's, but I take care of him..since Junior is working in Sandakan.. He loves me more than life itself.. I see it in his eyes every time I look at him.. He will do whatever I want, he will play and run when I'm ready but if I'm not, he will come up and lay down in my lap, just be quiet, be near me, use his body to cover me in warmth and comfort.. He gives me his strength...He truly is a wonderful friend..

Rocky, my handsome boy.. He will wait for me everyday, he is the first one to greet me by the gate..With his wagging tale, and his smiling face..(I can tell if he is smiling)..Skinny but the tallest among all..He's not bright but he's my boy, needs me to look after him. I worry about him right now..Not because he is sick..But I saw him chewing on a salted fish this evening..He got it from our generous neighbor who always throw food over the border of our house.. I hope he's ok.

And Angelo, my baby boy. My funny obsessive crazy boy..He is very smart..very adorable..His fur looks funny, and needs to be combed everyday..has big appetite but sometimes could be quite choosy..I love him so much..He makes me laugh..and makes me forget my problems..I think he could win the agility competition..Impressively, he could stand on his two feet for few seconds, and watching him standing like that just melts my heart...

And lastly..Bobbie..Who has lost to me forever because of a freak accident..I should have been more careful...He is so smart, and he was actually my first baby...He used to go to sleep everynight next to me with me scratching his belly. Now that he's gone..I'm still thinking of him every now and then..Wishing, if only he is still around...I miss you Bobbie...

There are so many more dogs that were in my life, I miss them all. They have all brought such joy and life to me, they are there for me to help me through the dark hours, they smile at me and cheer me up...when others get tired of my tears and my depression, my anger and sadness, you are all there for me and love me anyway. I am ok in your eyes...I am good enough...You give me what I most desire, to be good enough.

Thank you...

this is a tribute to my dogs...If they could only read...You might think I'm crazy, but..you don't know..How much I love my doggies..so, just bear with me...

The recent weekend was superb...being out in nowhere...Away from civilization...where everything is back to basic...It was tiring..especially the trek down and uphill..only to be surprised by a stream of water and not up to my expectation kinda waterfall...but nonetheless, it was fun..At least, now..I'm positive..Mount Kinabalu is just a piece of cake..Hahaha...For more stories or maybe Pics..Check out Gidong's, Lumis or the O2C's...Thanks to Mr.Clement (APARU HOLIDAYS) for inviting us...it was indeed a very rejuvenating weekend retreat...Thanks..

It was actually an unplanned trip..We were supposed to have our first caroling practice at home, but then...I received this most tempting invitation from Clement..Thanks to the O2C members who have come to join us...For those who were not able to come, don't worry, there's always next time...hehe...

bah, check out these pics...mana tau kamurang berminat mau pi sana next time...hehe..

Yang paling begaya tu pagi...Si sumpit dan si Ollen...

Right after breakfast, we had this so called community work...terpaksa naik bukit lagi mau pi tepi jalan and then moved the signboard so that it would be easier for passers by to see...


Menuju puncak...Bobby cam Roman Kapisan sudah ni..kwang3

erksss...Max..is that the best you can give...tingu si lumis, zouuuu noh diti ka boh...hehehehe


perut ka lagi tu bobby? huh!!!

Most people are insecure about at least one aspect of their personality or their body... Some people are held back in the things they do because of this... Very few people overcome their insecurities... And a very minute few have none at all...I think I’m one of them...:)

I’m not trying to boast about it, so forgive me if this comes out sounding egoistic..I'm not egoistic but I am not insecure.. I know my faults and my weaknesses... I know what I’m good at and I know where I need improvement... These things I’ve either noticed myself or others have pointed them out to me... And I acknowledge them and try to be the best I can be despite all that... I try to better myself, but sometimes you just can’t get over it, Can you??... And you don’t always have to...

Those who know me know I’m an open person.. I have an open mind and open ears and, unfortunately, an open mouth that’s open a little too often, just a little too much..sometimes... You might say I wear my heart on my sleeve... You’re probably right... I think I do.. I know it’s not a good thing... It makes me vulnerable and everyone’s aware of it... It doesn’t bother me though.. I’m not insecure about it... My heart maybe perched on my sleeve but that doesn’t mean I’m going to let you tear it apart... I’m careful most of the time. I haven’t been heartbroken since my previous break-up... I'm just enjoying everything for now...I'm blessed...I'm happy...

Just what is insecurity is all about...? Well, I guess it’s the state of being subject to danger or injury... But aren’t we always? Even if you think you’re well protected with a brick wall and a body of armour, do you ever feel really safe? I think we are all susceptible to being hurt... Sooner or later you will be... One day you will break down... One day you will be vulnerable... One day you too will wear your heart on your sleeve... One day you will ache like everyone else has... That day will come... Your brick wall won’t hold up forever..need not worry about it...it's something life has yet to offer you....

but for now...my gum is aching, that excruciating pain annoys the hell out of me...and I'm not enjoying it...huhuhu